A Very Merry Christmas From Green Ink

Green Ink wishes the greatest Christmas ever for everybody that had no hand in swindling the country. As for the rest of you, Green Ink hopes you choke to death on a turkey bone.

Sean Motherfucking Fitzpatrick

Wedgie for you Sean, when the revolution comes.

How many shades of brown can one man be?

Public Enquiry
Statement from Sean Motherfucking Fitzpatrick
Julian Gough
Gavin

The Irish Are A Soft Bunch Of Bastards

Look at what you tolerate then prove me wrong:

Irish Government’s Budget Deficit

The 'Rubber Room' Republic

There's no good ringing Joe Duffy after the horse has bolted. You made this by voting Fianna Fail, the most corrupt party in the State. You knew who you were voting for.

Well? What have you to say for yourselves?

A Christmas Message From The Lean Party

Sterling work you turkeys.

Minister DIck Roche Gunned Down In Hotel Heist

Sigh...

Cashing In On Throwing Shoes At George Bush

These beautiful genuine leather mens' shoes are the perfect projectile to hurl at visiting bellicose dignitaries. Specially crafted insoles mean miles and miles of walking on George Bush's face without the least discomfort. This is a limited time offer.
Don't think of it as buying a pair of throwing shoes. It's your investment in a beautiful heirloom you could pass down to your children if they hadn't been blown to bits by America.


And coming soon: the boomerang edition.

Round, Green, Salty and Falls

I just got a takeaway pizza with those little green salty things. They all fell off. I spent 5 minutes picking them off the floor before I realised what I was doing.

Some fucking caper.

Green Ink's Top Tips For Irish Consumers

Photo owned by Hanna Iris Tolonen (cc)

Find out how to make incredible savings over at Value Ireland.

Brian Lenihan Down To His Last Jewel-Encrusted Goblet

Brian Lenihan says we're living beyond our means. When did you figure that out Brian? When the banks were coming to you demanding you bail them out having given all their money to your developer friends who can't sell their shit houses in their shit estates? Well aren't you just a shiny penny of clevererness.
I simply haven't been able to even bring myself to comment on the last few weeks. That tends to happen when real life overtakes satire in terms of avarice, stupidity and greed. How do you exaggerate the largesse in FAS? The entire agency is a joke, I couldn't possibly add to it. I mean, spending almost the entire budget of a scheme on raising awareness of the scheme so there's no money left for the scheme. You couldn't get such refined existential meaninglessness if you blended the entire works of Beckett, Brecht, Camus and Kafka, put a chef's hat on Hannibal Lector and bribed him to make it into a fine filigree pastry with a bottle of chianti while waving Rody Molloy's liver in front of him.
Anyone has any ideas on how we go about a bloodless revolution? Bear in mind I don't think Fianna Fail bleed.
In Recession Ireland, Fianna Fail bleeds you!